Monday, June 30, 2008

Sexy Never Left: Tina Fey

There are lots and lots of hot chicks out there. There are oodles and oodles of gorgeous babes, countless sexy kittens; all of whom deserve any and all of the accolades that are heaped upon them. It's a given that I love them all. However there's nothing that makes my heart throb more than a real sexy W-O-M-A-N. Ah yes, a real woman; not young lady, not lady but woman in every sense of the word.

This week it's all about those who fit the bill so to speak. Intelligent, natural, confident, never letting age dictate their sexiness - in fact I swear these women get sexier with age. Believe me, this is a treat for me and I hope you find delight in them and all that they stand for as well.

Who better to kick things off with than the ever supreme and sexy Tina Fey!

Tina Fey has the rare quality of being sweet yet sexy and hot all at the same time. She's also hot, sexy and all of the things I mentioned above. This in turn poses quite a challenge for the many people who want to and do blog about her. I mean, which quality do you concentrate on when writing? Which one do you want to ring to the fore most? Which one do you desire to emphasize the most?

I think when it all boils down to the wire, the answer is quite obvious. When one woman possesses such a combination of assets, then one cannot help but do his/her best but to highlight them all. It's just that simple. But see, therein lies the irony or should I say trouble.

Trouble at least for me; because as I've stated umpteen times before, I'm no writer. Never professed to be one and never will.

If just blogging about her is this conflicting for me, imagine if I were to meet in person. Why I'd sure be tempted to pinch her cheeks and let her know how cute and sweet she is. On the other hand, I would have to fight really hard not to undress her with my eyes, pinch her on the butt and let her know just how hot she is.

At the same time, I'd have a hell of a time restraining myself from just all out grabbing her firmly around the waist and kissing her passionately and let her know that she ignites an inferno in me. That she releases an animalistic desire in and could melt me with her smile because she's as sexy as any supermodel. See my dilemma?

The fact that is she's all that and a bag of chips (with sour cream and onion dip). But wait! I'm not done. Least there's more to this woman that needs to be told. did I fail to mention that she is one of the funniest women on television? How damn remiss of me. And at the risk of sounding like a stuck record, the woman get across the most serious of issues in the most comedic way while maintaining the magnitude of importance and seriousness of the matter being put forward. How she does it is beyond me. It must be a gift.

One of the most amazing things about Tina Fey is that she does it all with such ease. If there was ever a title, trophy or some other type of award for the hottest most unassuming, unpretentious and genuine person in the world, then Fey would earn it hands down. Fey is one of the (if not the) sexiest, most gorgeous women in the universe. But you don't have to take my word for it, just ask the members and staff at AfterEllen or Dorothy Snarker

This blog would certainly not be complete without my Tina Fey Cheer!


Friday, June 27, 2008

Go Shorty It's Your Birth Month: Angelina Jolie

My week of celebrating June culminates with this week's hottie - Angelina Jolie. I ask you to bear with me on this one. At times I may seem to contradict myself, but trust me, in my head it makes total sense.

I can only assume that if it makes perfect sense to you as well, that you are just as messed up as I am. It's either that or those of us who do get it are wise beyond our years. You know they saying - to each his own. And there's also - there's method to my madness or it all depends on how you look at it. Of course, I could just be making excuses to justify the bare fact that I'm weird or just a plain nutcase. Either way, do I even give a shit - I think not. Thinking about stuff like that is just too much thinking if you ask me.

Enough of my rambling though; let's get on with the show. First off, there's something I've been wanting to get off my chest about this Jolie, well actually it's the Jolie-Pitt, fiasco. This might be quite late in coming, but I couldn't complete a blog about Jolie without just spitting it out. It's the whole love triangle thing with Aniston and all. How in the hell was it all Jolie's fault? Nowhere had I read or seen anything pointing out that Brad 'who belongs in a snake pit' Pitt was culpable in anyway.

Did she walk up to him with one of her many guns, hold him at gunpoint and demanded that he screw Aniston over? Well, did she? Of course, I wasn't there but I think not. The way I see it, she's 40% to blame and he 60%. Why? It's quite damn simple! He is the one who was committed to another at the time of the whole damn thing. Therefore he merits that extra 20%. The onus was on him to say 'hold the hell up there, I'm with someone'. I'm not just picking on him.

At the other end of the spectrum, I'm just as disgusted with them both over the whole ordeal. She has earned the title of home-wrecker; there's no doubt in my mind about that. They both have.

Another thing that I need to put out there is that I honestly don't get all the hype about the 'lips' thing with Jolie and how stunningly beautiful she is. I honestly most times find her lips unattractive. There I've said it, I've said it and I can see the disgust and astonish looks on every one's face. I feel better now and thus can proceed with this whole thing of putting the focus back where it belongs.

Now having said all of the above, let me go on record to say that Angelina Jolie is H-O-T! Please note the difference. I cannot be the only one who things that a certain part of any person's anatomy can be unattractive but the person is still hot and sexy. Can I? Say it isn't so.

I find Jolie to be truly hot when she's not stick thin. When she is, she's one of the most unattractive persons in the universe (imho). Her body rocks, the bone structure of her face is uncommon (to some extent) and totally works for her.

I'm not especially blown away by her acting chops but she does a pretty decent job of it and is getting better with each film.

In as much as this might all be coming across as negative, that is not the case at all. I'm just being honest and I'm 100% honest when I state unequivocally that (outside of the love-triangle ordeal) I admire and respect Jolie deeply.

This affection was not just heaped upon her all willy-nilly. Jolie has earned my respect. I admire that she lives her life the way that she sees fit. I tip my hat to her holding her own. Standing her ground. Not giving a shit, no... not giving a fuck about what anyone deems unfit for her to be doing or wearing or thinking or saying, etc etc.

If there's anyone who wants to know what 'being comfortable in your own skin' means, just take a long hard look at Angelina Jolie. I cannot begin to express the magnitude of respect I have for people who are just that. Too many walk around trying to fit into a clique, a group, to be what someone else wants or approves of. And again I say, fuck it all and go Angie. You got my vote.

She's downright sexy. Any sexier than that and she'd be too sexy for her shirt, her car, her hat, her house, etc....

She lives her life the best way she knows how. She's not swayed by the press and other media. She's not overwrought by dictating family members. She's not running to change her hair or eyes or anything else to make people, fans, whoever flock to her side or heap praises upon her. For that, I will stand up and give kudos any given day, minute or hour.

Angelina Jolie is a true humanitarian in every sense of the word. Fuck the nay-sayers. Fuck them all. Seriously, just fuck it. It amazes me how people will just grab at anything to put a negative spin on something that they do not approve of.

Where is the wrong in adoption a parentless child? What's so bad about giving a child in need food to eat, clothes on his/her back, a good home and environment to grow up in. And it's gotta be some god-forsaken thing to love and nurture one of these kids right!

Caring about places on this earth and the people therein is some unforgivable sin that's gonna damn you to hell for sure. Right? Do I feel just a little strongly about this thing? Well, maybe just a little. What? Is it showing?

Angelina Jolie Voight was born on June 4, 1975. She was born in Los Angeles, California and is an actor and Goodwill Ambassador for the UN Refugee Agency. She is Slovak and German on her father's side and French Canadian on her mother's side. As a teenager she did some modelling and appeared in a number of music videos.

She started her acting career in 1982 alongside her father Jon Voight in the movie Lookin' to Get Out. She is probably best known for her roles in George Wallace (1997), Gia (1998), Girl Interrupted (1999), Lara Croft: Tomb Raider (2001) which made her a household name and Mr. & Mrs. Smith which also brought her critical acclaim.

She is the winner of 3 Golden Globe Awards, 1 National Board Review Award, 2 Screen Actors Guild Awards, 1 Academy Award, 2 BET Awards, 1 Broadcast Film Critics Association Award, 1 Hollywood Film Festival Award, 1 L.A. Outfest Award, 1 MTV Award, 1 NRJ Cine Award, 1 People's Choice Award and 1 Teen Choice Award.

I think I've said/ranted quite enough today. Feel free to do the clicking thing on the images for a close up view.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Go Shorty It's Your Birth Month: Heidi Klum

Happy am I that Heidi's birthday is in June! Did I say happy? Make that Ecstatic! I'm doing the happy Snoopy dance; yay! Heidi I loved you before, but believe me I love you even more now.

I think it's well known that I would use any excuse to blog about Heidi Klum. And isn't it nice that I actually have one.

I admire this beautiful woman to the core. She represents everything that I subscribe to as being the embodiment of a real woman. Super model, super mom, super wife and dare I say super woman. Yes that's how I often refer her; Super Woman - yes indeed.

Body that will make you stop and stare.

Personality that's so true and endearing.

She never fails to give credit where credit is due.

She's selfless. Have you caught her interviews on the numerous red carpet. Heidi is one to compliment the person interviewing her. Not only does she give compliments, but you can bet your bottom dollar that the compliments are genuine.

What I truly love about Klum, is her sense of humor. She'll be the first to make fun of herself. She's comfortable in her own skin. She's secure in the super woman that she is. She's sensible, intelligent, beautiful and ever so gracious. How could anyone not love her?

This woman can win you over with her smile. She exudes charm so effortlessly.

She was born on June 1, 1973 (how you like them apples... the first damn day of June... what a way to start this awesome month!) in Germany. She's is a supermodel, actress, TV presenter, fashion designer, television producer and occasional singer and is well known for her modeling work with Victoria's Secret.

Oh yeah, I'm really, really loving June.

In fact I feel like singing. I feel pretty, Oh so pretty, I feel pretty and witty and gay...